Dual to the Death

Awoke with the realization that most - maybe from the very first word I could understand - if not all of my life has been done dirt by dualism.  Sensing/seeing one thing being done, while being told in no uncertain WORDS that what I was seeing/feeling simply wasn't so.  

Guess that's why it meant the world to me when my father held me to my own words, that I didn't care if I went out on Halloween or not, because he was honoring what I said, however rash & snotty it was.  Sure, it felt beyond rotten to miss trick or treating, but it also felt somehow welcome that someone expected my word & deed to be one & the same.  

My church reinforced the sense of dualism I experienced at home, albeit in a different way.  LOVE and WISDOM, GOOD and TRUTH were emphasized time & again, but I don't recall any special emphasis being placed & repeated on the actual end of a genuinely spiritual life  - drawing them together into a unique whole.  Oh, it was mentioned, but it still feels to me like the terms, rather than the concepts, were depicted as primary.

The life of faith is one of natural activity, rather than vocabulary.  It is learning enough about how best to help & heal ourselves & others that we can let go of the lessons & simply let it work through us.  The way that leads to heaven has nothing to do with living life IN ORDER to be with the Divine to eternity, but to - without thought of recompense - avoid doing things that harm & do things that help & heal.  

What an appropriate day - the 19th of June, New Church Day - to ponder how the church flag shouldn't be half red, half white, but all pink.  To ponder how spiritually deadly it is to think in staunchly dual terms, rather than from a core of conjunction.  

It's said that a true Zen master has learned all there is to know, then - having learned it - forgets it and just goes about living.  Makes sense to me.  Like typing, where it took me weeks, months to learn enough about where the keys were, which fingers to use, to type without looking.  If I'd stayed in the "dual" mode of information & mechanics, would still be hunting & pecking.  Or as Breton Blair said all those years ago in his Oratorical Contest (now "Event") presentation, we need to know when we've nailed our lines, mastered our blocking, then letting go & just let whatever it is roll out.  

Because if we hold onto all the dualism that wants to intrude into our lives, we'll end up dualed to spiritual death.