Constant Amazement

It always amazes me how life has shifted over the past few months to be infinitely more wisely managed. The change didn't happen through anything that I did, but it would not have been possible without everything I'd done.

My birth faith teaches - as so many others do, too - that change doesn't come from within us, but from God, or whom I refer to as All That Is.  All we can do is prepare the way, become a vessel.  To set intention, do the work, let go of expectation, and experience what reveals itself.

Who would have thought that going to a Sunday morning church service in Chalfont, PA - a service lead by my dear friend, Edie Weinstein, my own Katie Joy - would transform my life so utterly completely profoundly?  Well, duh - she gave the talk at Circle of Miracles, so I guess it shouldn't have been so surprising!  Because what happened on that Sunday morning was the 4th (at least) downright miracle in my life.

Edie asked each of us to bring something that epitomized our "inner gremlin."  Now, I've done inner gremlin work for many, many years, dating to before Mom was reunited with her O! Best Beloved.  And it always said, "Picture your gremlin." 

Well, I never could.  Until Edie. 

Then - POW!  An image appeared, clear & strong.  My inner gremlin looks just like the Hawaiaan Punch guy!  Not anything ugly or scary, just a short guy with a bright Hawaiian shirt & a jazzed up hat.  That was my inner gremlin!  I wore the Hawaiian shirt that Mim gave Dad, along with a beautiful silk flower lei. 

I was the ONLY one who came dressed as her inner gremlin.  But maybe being dressed - prepared - the way opened me up to flipping a well-intentioned but horrifically effective inner saboteur into an invaluable constant ally, one that helps point out the next best thing to do & DO it.  

Early early this a.m., got  me pondering now blessed I've been to be open to, downright thirsty for, finding better ways to live my life.

Sad, but true, I grew up with family who seemed clueless on how to make day-to-day life work. Yes, even Mom was challenged that way  Not a judgement, just an observation.  Over the years, I learned LOTS of ways to mess up life, but ways to make things work smoothly, efficiently & effectively?  Nope.

Living effectively, being core competent, have been beacon desires in my life for as long as I can remember.  It explains the immediate connection with John, a most astonishing nurturing ground for healthy living.  Not by telling, but simply by being.  

This morning, I cleaned up the kitty litter (instead of ignoring it, waiting for John to see & take care of it) because of an immediate inner sense that made me do the right thing instead of averting my eyes & responsibility.  

It's stuns me how  I can prepare the way, but true change flows in from a Higher Place.  It is a constant amazement to be 60 years old & experiencing "getting it" for the first time.  And it's a delightful surprise that my response hasn't been to sit back & say "Finally!" but instead to, with great joy & gratitude for what is, keep preparing those ways.  What's next?  Keeping on preparing paths, partnering clearly formed intention with action steps, letting go of expectation of outcome, then welcoming new ways & means to live in joy,